Garden Cafe & Restaurant, South Hampstead
3 Goldhurst Terrace
NW6 3HX (Map)
020 7328 2295
by Goldie Quorn and Veggie Kray
Her: So there’s not actually a garden here. Just a patio and 80’s mint green walls.
Him: Oh don’t be so down on the place. It’s perfectly pleasant.
Her: If a little soulless.
Him: We’ve got choice of a ‘Vegetarian Breakfast’ or…. a panini. But the breakfast does come with chips…
Her: Well that’s something.
Him: ….and eggs and tomatoes and beans and mushrooms and toast AND hash browns.
Her: Potato-tastic. But where’s the centre piece? How hard is it to add a veggie sausage to that? Bloody palming us off with the meat-eaters fillers again.
Him: I think it sounds nice.
Her: Should do at £6.95.
Him: Look, they’ve even sprinkled herbs on the tomatoes!
Her: The toast is margarine-juicy. And my eggs are runny. (Pause) Chips are nice though.
Him: Can you even taste them under all that ketchup?
Her: Just about, although it’s not Heinz. Too much vinegar.
Him: You seem to be coping.
Her: God, I’m totally beaten.
Him: See? What more could you want from a breakfast?
Her: A veggie sausage or two?